The Story of Nurse and a Doula
Nurses and Doulas
I am a strange conflict of interests. I am a Bachelor's Degree RN as well as a birth doula. Most would say this doesn’t work- you can’t do both. But I’m here to say- you can!
Chances are if you’ve done any amount of birth work you’ve had great experiences with nurses, and not so great experiences. Let me tell you, as an RN, most of us- can be very territorial. Some say it’s because of the genuine amount of care and concern that RNs typically have; however, others would say that a typical nurse can be fairly bossy and likes to be in control. I am so proud of my profession and believe there is a beautiful way to combine these two unique skills. Here is a few things I would say to have a great experience with RNs in the birth world.
Mutual Respect- Having respect as the birth worker for the RN’s “turf” is imperative. This is their job, the way they make their income, and it’s their patient. They are responsible for the well being of momma and baby and take that job very seriously. Make sure you introduce yourself, and that you clearly state what your role is; that you are not there in any medical capacity and are just there to support momma through the process of labor and birth. I have found when I have treated the nurse with the same amount of respect I deserve we end up having a very mutually benefiting relationship.
Thank them- A thank you can go so far in acknowledging someone’s worth and value. Make sure that at some point during the course of treatment you acknowledge and thank them for taking such good care of your client and for making sure she and her baby were in the best hands possible- regardless of how the care actually went.
Shut up- I can’t say it enough, but one “bossy” or “bad” doula, ruins it for the next five that come into that facility. You are the doula, you are not in charge, you do not speak for momma, and you cannot dictate what happens in that facility. Sure, as a doula our job is to help achieve the best possible outcome for all involved, but the fastest way to get on a nurse's bad side is to come in as the boss who thinks she is going to dictate the way everything will go in the course of this birth. Not only does it ruin the current relationship, it gives a bad name to other doulas who will come in after you. Think before you speak.
Be present- The best way to make best friends with nurses is to be present. Nurses are often overworked, have too many patients, are tired, hungry, and have families and lives of their own at home. Being present with your client can take some of that workload off of the nurse. By being present for your client, without being bossy or controlling, you show your value and worth to the RN in the room. One good doula will have the RN begging for every client to have a doula when they birth.
RN and Doulas compliment each other in such a beautiful role. They are both all about the patient, they love what they do, and they desire the best for all involved. It’s time to start working together and building relationships that not only benefit our lives, but also the lives of the clients we serve.
